I am the type of person who can take control when I need to but when making major life decision I tend to ponder, mull it over, ponder over, withdraw over making a decision and is only when things get too far will I make change.
The latest example would be my decision to ask E for a divorce and inform him that I no longer want to be married to him and our marriage was not working.
I had know for most of our marriage it wasn’t working, but tried over and over again to make it work. Tried many different things to make things better. It took 2 years, for me to actually to tell him what I was thought and felt, I really didn’t want to hurt him, I wanted us to stay friends and to get along for the kids sake.
I thought I was doing really well at it all, sharing the house until he found somewhere else to live, talking regularly on the phone or over Facebook. Well that was until he found this blog now he is pissed at me, refusing to talk to me and even refusing to be around the kids at moment. The last week, he has been demanding that I come home, phoning me to talk then hang up on me. Even tried to talk to him this afternoon, he was the same way oh well. Sometimes you can’t do right, for doing wrong.
Sorry there hasn’t been much posting from me lately but I am back at my home, my ex hubby has finally moved out. I have trying to get my house into some sort of order; but I am struggling to do so but I will get there, and basically my life has been very vanilla lately. With Daddy away at the moment it is not helping to feel connected with my kinkier side either.
I have done all the housework I willing to do today
Mopped all the floors
Done 4 loads of washing
Ex-Sir did ask if I was wearing the maid’s outfit today hehe. Nope just a pretty dress for me today.
Now I find that I am on my own, and the kids are out all day today that leads to trouble hehe….. so decided to have some fun with my webcam and hair; sorry about the quality. Even my mobile and email been quiet oooooooooooh well
Is pain or humiliation (spankings for example) a part of your submission? What is your relationship to it? Do you embrace it as a part of your submission, tolerate it as necessary or have some other type of relationship with it? Continue reading →