30 Days Of Submission: Day Twenty Five

Simply beautiful picture

re there items, objects or rituals that represent or help you express submission? If not, have you ever thought of adding or being gifted one? Is there a special significance to these objects or rituals?

I suppose the ultimate object which symbol submission would be that of a collar.  For which, I have asked Daddy not to even start looking for one until I first become divorced from E and I hand back my training collar; even symbolically, to ex-Sir; who has been dragging his heels over this.

E and I were together for twelve years, married ten.  Even though our relationship has been on the rocks for many years before I finally asked him for the separation and divorce.  It has taken him so time to get head around, the fact I have had enough of not getting my needs meet; not just sexual ones either, I am tired being of his mother, housemaid, cook and cleaner and getting nothing in return not even a hug never mind kiss or hell forbid sex.

The thing that hurt the most between E and I was the fact he didn’t see that there was any issues at all.  He would put it down to me being hormonal; I do suffer PMT but not all the time, or my illness was rearing it’s ugly head; when he was one who was depressed, and when he asked what I wanted most for my last birthday and I replied “To spend a evening where I have your full attention, I don’t need presents or card, just your attention.”  He spent the evening of my birthday playing on computer, ignoring me I knew I couldn’t go on with our marriage any longer.

That is hardest conversation I have ever had with someone in my lifetime and not one I ever want to repeat in a hurry.

He is not in a hurry to get the divorce heck he is dragging his heels about even moving out, I will not push him, argue with him or tell him to go instead I am spending more and more time away from my home.  As I find the more you argue or push E to do anything, the more he digs his feet in and becomes as stubborn as a two year old when you tell them “No!”.  He is now moving out within a month <cheer>.

Ex-Sir knows that I want to meet up with him, so I can symbolically hand back the collar that he during my training.  I feel the need I need to do this, as since Daddy have gotten together ex-Sir has been trying to be Dominate over me and can’t see why it would be an issue not only for me, but he is being really disrespectful towards Daddy as I have chosen to submit  to him now.

Ex-Sir has to be politely reminded that he released me and therefore I no longer have to obey his every command.  I want him to remain a friend, but if he continues the way he has then I may be left with no choice but to ask him not to contact me again.

Only when those both things happen will I be willing for Daddy to even consider collaring me. Daddy and I have been married before and neither of us want to remarry; each for our own reasons, so if and when Daddy does collar me it will as symbolic as a wedding band would be for a “normal” relationship.  Thankfully Daddy understands why I have made this decision  and lucky for me he has accepted it and he says “That will make me collaring you, even more special baby girl”, we do have “temp” collar in case we go to munch or BDSM met and greet, so Daddy will not get in trouble with the other Dominates that we are likely to meet.

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