How do you know you are submissive or have the potential to be submissive?
In the back of my head, I have always know or been a submissive person; even though I didn’t know what is was specifically called, within the majority of romantic relationships. I believe I have been a submissive in nearly every part of my real-life.
I started to seriously research on the internet about BDSM five years ago; although know about BDSM and the lifestyle for two decades, that is when I began to pick all the different terms, titles, etc. It wasn’t until then I knew to call what I was and more what it actually truly meant to me and any relationship which I was in.
During this time, my now ex-husband and I were experiencing problems within our marriage, I tried really hard to sort them and make my marriage work. After 2 years I realised or woke up to the fact I was only one trying to make our marriage work. It took nearly another three years to get up the courage to inform my ex-husband.
My ex-husband has always know about my interest in BDSM, but he would never allow me to partake or to experiment with me, which I have and will always respect him for, as this lifestyle is not for everyone.
It wasn’t until I starting chatting with ex-Sir, who was a online friend, told me I would make the “perfect submissive”, I started freaking as I thought I hidden it really real well from others, but ex-Sir saw right through all.
He was showed me what all what being a submissive would and could be like it, should be in the future. Although, our affair was short-lived, I consider him my mentor and one off my truest friend; as he know whole of me, one of about three people in my life currently who do.
Daddy is one other person who know the whole me, even the parts I thought I hidden well. He also allows me to submissive not just in the bedroom, but throughout our relationship. He does and will to further explore my submission with not just him, but with others.
Only other person who know the whole of me is Boss, I consider him a true friend, he has been there; along with a number of others who I might discuss in later posts, who help my with the issues with Daddy and for that I will be forever be grateful and I owe him a huge drink and a big hug 😉 collect any time you wish Boss.
How do you feel when you express your submission?
This question is the easiest for me to answer, but will be the hardest to explain to you all.
I feel complete, whole, at peace, at home, perfect, total, rounded and probably few thousand other words I could find in the English dictionary. I can find all right words and put them in order that would make sense; when I wish I was more of a words-smith than I am.
I know there is times where I am serving I have felt close to crying with tears of joy as I have felt my life is so perfect. I am not sure if that is normal reaction or not as I personally don’t many other submissives. But this is about me and my submission so I am accepting it as the norm, whether that is right or wrong I don’t care, it is what have experienced with my journey and the relationships within that lifestyle.
I know I still have a long way to go, as for me this is just the start and I pray that it is no where near the end yet as I want to experience it all.
Therefore, no matter what happens between Daddy and I, I proclaim here I am a submissive women and I will continue to be no matter in which dynamic it is within in the future.